PTSD

When the relationship ended I would not have guessed that I would have had my entire existence broken in the aftermath. I’ve found myself being mindful and introspective now that our new normal has begun. I am unraveling a complicated relationship, I am re-remembering a decade worth of memories and I’m beginning to address my…

sober

i couldn’t stand your touch when i was sober remembering what the lips that kissed mine said the hands that threw the mug are caressing me touch. penetrate. brown, preferably. kissless. moans; pity-filled. you have no idea. life’s too clear when you’re sober.

Fracture

With each passing day I find myself more amazed by the ways in which the brain protects itself. As a result of my childhood traumas, I have developed an insanely effective and diverse cache of defense mechanisms. I feared being abused or otherwise hurt so I tried to be very agreeable. I found what brought…

What do you accept?

Self-pity is something that I’m trying to be mindful of when I start reflecting. There are some things that I have to remember. For example, yes, I tried my best and gave too much but that doesn’t mean that is enough to change how someone treats you. A person will treat you how they want….

4:44

I still remember how I felt when I initially listened to the first sixty seconds of 4:44. That sample from Hannah Williams and The Affirmations gave me goosebumps. I restarted it several times before allowing it to play through. I bopped by head along with the track, my face scrunched up. That shit sounded so…

Kintsugi

Kintsugi is the ancient Japanese art of fixing broken pottery with precious metals, usually gold. Instead of hiding the flaws, Kintsugi adorns these imperfections. Kintsugi highlights the history and embraces the strength in those broken pieces coming together and forming something new, complex and beautiful. The art from broken pieces.